I have news...but most of the standard metaphors are kind of clunky and inappropriate. "Knocked up" makes me think of some weird zero-G mixed martial arts. "Bun in the Oven" is too Hansel-and-Gretel/cannibalish. And "expecting" makes me think that someone is never going to finish their sentence.
This is more delicate than you might think. I know that I have to maintain the dignity of the situation. On the other hand, though, I also have to communicate the joy, excitement, and potential of the event. While I am a professional writer and thus have to hunt for metaphors all the time, this one is relatively important, so I really hope this does it justice:
My spousal unit and I would like to announce that, on or about the 8th day of this upcoming June, the future master and potentate of the universe will arrive, and we, as a couple, are the responsible party...so some of the "hails" should be for us.
Heartfelt cheers and congrats to all involved. Stay happy, healthy, and enthused throughout the whole of this wonderful time.
Well the best I can do is offer the future Master my first born's first born, Alanna, should the master be a He this should please him greatly to have a beautiful she by his side, should the master be a she, she should be please to have a loyal "girlfriend" and maid by her side! LOL BTW, Don't tell my first born, she will kill me!!! Congrats to you both and Much Love!!
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