My identity has, for a long time, been bound up in relation to music. First, I was the guy struggling to learn. Then I was a guy who was constantly told he sucked as a musician. Then I was the guy who used to be a musician.
Later, I joined a band and then became a guy who struggled to think of himself as a musician. Eventually, I came to terms with being a good guitarist and songwriter. So of course, that band had to break up, and I started to see myself as the guy who used to be in a band.
Relatively quickly, though, I was invited to join another band. I had to get used to being a musician in a whole different context. Then half the band quit on us. Luckily enough, before I could start trying to think of myself as a former musician again, we got a better rhythm section, and I was able to start thinking of myself as a musician in a kick-ass band.
We recently put out an album on an indy label. This means, of course, I feel more of a musician as ever.
This February, I decided to go out on a pretty shaky limb and perform as a solo artist. This meant, of course, another change--into being a self-sufficient musical entity.
I've been writing all night, so I have been feeling all singer/songwriter. Saturday, though, my band plays a show, so I guess I'll revert to lead guitar guy.
It's fun being a musician...regardless of the key of the song.